To me 'growing up' meant having things figured out. Knowing what I want and how to get it. No more creative accounting to explain your college expenses. No more exams and boring books but drinking the best wines, dining at those glitzy restaurants. Getting a job that makes you happy and being in love with a person who understands you.Weren't we all eager to get out of those grad schools to start such a wonderful, free and perfect life? 

Now that I am there, things don't seem as exciting as I thought they would be. We don't fall in love like Carrie Bradshaw neither do we own a closet like her.  You end up in a love-hate relationship with your body weight. Our day starts with a struggle to coax our hair to act the way we want it to. Trying to avoid those fries so that you fit into the dress for your friend's wedding. Oh yes your friends start getting married one by one. Say adios to the midnight trips to the beach and getting drunk for no reason whatsoever. You don't get a shoe purchase allowance you thought you would so at the month end you are in a pair of Louboutins sobbing over phone bills. Your post-graduation is helping you draw up fancy spread sheets and presentations when you thought you would be changing the world. And you can't chat up the cute guy at the bar because he is still in college. Your family is constantly at your neck for 'settling down'. Reading ‘Things to do before 30’ makes you feel sorry for all the hours wasted lazing around on Sundays in front of the TV. 

Then I realized, maybe I had this figured out all wrong. Maybe growing up is not about being absolutely sure about each and every thing. So what you still call your mom at 3 am complaining about preposterous food pangs? Or if you relentlessly read Vogue when you should be going over those stock prices? Falling in love after a one night stand is completely understandable. And so is spending money on that Vera Wang coat. Being an adult is to know that some things won't work out your way. But then it shouldn't stop you from trying to turn around things anyway. Your friends will be in far off corners of the world, busy handling their jobs and sorting their affairs. It is about knowing that they'll catch you every time you fall no matter what. Takeout meals on the roof alone can be better than chasing ordinary relationships for everlasting love. Relationships need not be grand and great. It can be about simple home cooked meals with laughter and Monopoly. Your first job need not have a greater purpose nor should it be part of your ultimate dream. So what your boss doesn't like you already? He'll come along or there are always those icy margaritas to share your troubles with.

Growing up is about being strong in unusual circumstances and learning to accept that you might not be everyone's idea of a normal person. And it ok to not know where your life is heading or what you'll have for lunch tomorrow. Growing up is not about winning the war. It is about survival. One credit card bill at a time.